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I'm from the planet Saturn, where there has been no crime at all for centuries, and where everyone can perform amazing mental feats! One day, when I traveled to Earth, I felt a sudden desire to outwit the law with my powers of super-hypnotism, and so I joined the Legion of Super-Villains!
It is not enough to kill the Legionnaires, or plunder their precious United Planets... we have a destiny. You shall assist me in destroying civilization, and restoring the precious anarchy that is the birthright of the universe.