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Jonah Hex (New Earth)/Quotes

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Quotes

Quote1 I'm sending you to ta Hell with a message. When you meet the Devil... tell 'em Jonah Hex sends his regards. Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 Git away from here, yuh blasted critter! Or'so help me ah'll climb on outa this barrel an' blow yore ears off! Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 Whut in the ding-dong? Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 Well, ah'll be jiggered! Thar ain't no b'ars! Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 Yuh trade easy, woman! This time I'm not buyin'! Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 Finally I slept... and feared when I woke up I'd be a pickle Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 Both muh six-guns is so clogged up with swamp muck, they'd be more likely tuh fire bird droppin's than bullets! Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 We was in the church choir together. Later, we're gonna have a "Come-to-Jesus" meetin'. Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 Yo're all gonna hang! 'Cept'n fer you, sugar muffin! You pout yore sweet lips at thet judge, Ah'm bettin' he'll let you off easy as pie! Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 One more day locked up inside this here roomin' house with nobody but thet female Simon Legree fer company - an' ah'll be ripe fer an extended stay in some booby-hatch! Quote2
--Jonah Hex


Quote1 I ain't gonna barter or negotiate. All conversation is gonna be handled with bullets. Quote2
--Jonah Hex



DC Rebirth Logo
This page contains a listing of all notable quotes by Jonah Hex (New Earth).

It may not be the definitive list, so please add any important quotations that may be missing, ensuring to cite the original source.
Pages with a quote from this character will automatically be added here along with the quote.

(This template will categorize articles that include it into Category:Quotes.)
Quote1 Let thet be a lesson to you, boy -- never show yore back to a man aimin' to kill ya. Quote2
--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Don't thank me, woman... pay me. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 ...no torture, jus' death! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Better he'p me... off'n this floor... boy! I-It's... cold. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Course ah ain't scared or nuthin'! Muh flesh alluz crawls this way! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah'm only one man. Ah cain't stop the whole world from bein' crazy. But ah hired on to do a job! And by gum -- ah aim to do it! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 'Pears like a good time to switch to Plan B. Shore do wish ah had me a Plan B. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Problem last night wuz thet ah wuzn't quite forceful enough. This time ah aim to rectify thet. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 A good scrap ever' now an' then shore do add spice to a dull life, don't it, Jonah boy? Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Shorely did seem like one heckuva good idea when ah first had it -- but now ah've got whar ah'm convinced these just ain't my kinda folks -- !! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Back in the old days, of course, when some varmints wuz tryin' to splatter yore brains all over the whole outdoors... you'd ask yourself who are they? Where'd they come from? Why in thunderation are they gunnin' fer me? But in this here world... why, shucks... strangers go around maimin' an' killin' each other just to while away the time of day. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 It ain't nuthin' but a big old-fashioned Turkey shoot. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Let me tell ya this, mister! Ah am normally a mild-mannered, easy-goin', unassumin' kinda hombre -- but you are beginnin' tuh make me -- mad!! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Don't hardly seem like the human race has accomplished much these past two hunnert years. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Wild West wuzn't never like this, gal. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Better give muhself up now, ah s'poe, afore ah go off an' do something whut gets somebody really mad. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Bars whar yuh kin get drunk? Now holdup men with guns! Why... ah'll be durned if'n it ain't practically old-home week! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Thet that electricity they got these days is really somethin'! Ah'll bet one day they come up with a million uses fer it! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I was considerin' lettin' you grab for your gun. Just to be sportsman-like. Then I thought, "nah." Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I fought for the Confederacy because I felt the South was my country. I fought cause yankees come down here. You bein' colored ain't no thing to me one way or another. But you keep snarlin' at me, I'm gonna jerk a knot in your cob, and use the kid's hand to do it. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Sort of got a soft streak, don't you? Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 You're spendin' all your time tryin' to keep them off your place, so they got the advantage. When we was fightin' Yankees and all the odds was on their side, we could fight another day if we took it to 'em... mad and quick. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Can't say as I like that none. Don't reckon these here are the town greeters. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I sure seem to be Hell on whores. One way or another. Reckon I can give her some work and some money. That would be the Christian thing to do. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I'm beginning to feel like a kinda whore myself, ain't even done my first show. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Surprise, you dumb asshole. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 If there's one thing I can't abide... it's a snorer. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I hate a fella takes his time dying. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 'Cept for being wanted for murder and shootin' up a lot of townsfolks, life was a little borin' anyway. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 It wasn't a thing that appealed to me. I hated poetry and a hand up my ass only appealed to me in a kinda marginal manner. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 We was in the church choir together. Later, we're gonna have a "Come-to-Jesus" meetin'. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I'm sending you ta Hell with a message. When you meet the Devil... tell 'em Jonah Hex sends his regards. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Yo're pretty tough when it comes tuh usin' thet bullwhip on young'uns whut's half yore size, skunk. How's 'bout you show us how brave you kin be 'gainst a full-growed man! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah swear, sometimes ah think ah oughtta give up the kinda life ah lead an' mebbie open up a general store or somethin'! At least thet way of life might be a little more simple! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Reverend Hex tuh you, skunk! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Him whut lives like a skunk, shore gonna die like a skunk! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 A week!? Ah ain't plannin' on endurin' yore ugly company fer a whole blasted week! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah've alluz wanted tuh meet three men whut had a pig fer a mother and a mangy skunk fer a paw. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah kin not tell a lie, skunks. Ah did it, wif muh little Bowie knife. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Kiss you? Ha! Ah wouldn't even let my horse kiss you! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 You better pray thet girl lives. 'Cause if'n she don't, ah'm gonna come back here an' blow yore head off! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah've been around one heckuva long while, darlin'! Ah've met women whut've had bats in the belfry before! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Well, ah'll be a raccoon! Just lookit all them aces! It ain't too often yuh see cards like thet... in a losin hand! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Muh freedom ain't gonna be worth a whole lot once ah'm dead! Now s'pose you quit runnin' yore mouth an' start pumpin' thet Winchester! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Both muh six-guns is so clogged up with swamp muck, they'd be more likely tuh fire bird droppin's than bullets! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Yo're all gonna hang! 'Cept'n fer you, sugar muffin! You pout yore sweet lips at thet judge, Ah'm bettin' he'll let you off easy as pie! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 One more day locked up inside this here roomin' house with nobody but thet female Simon Legree fer company - an' ah'll be ripe fer an extended stay in some booby-hatch! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Well, ah'll be jiggered! Thar ain't no b'ars! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Git away from here, yuh blasted critter! Or'so help me ah'll climb on outa this barrel an' blow yore ears off! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Whut in the ding-dong? Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Normally I'd hang you. But I figure your actions warrant something really cruel and unusual. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Rest easy. They'll pay in blood for what they did to you and yours. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah told you ah wasn't going ta let you bleed ta death. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I'm sending you to ta Hell with a message. When you meet the Devil... tell 'em Jonah Hex sends his regards. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Sleep well, Padre. Tomorrow they're all gonna die. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Yore blazin' a trail a blind man could follow, marshal... Only I don't like where it's headin'. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah got no problem with ya gettin' yerselves killed, but get in muh way again an' shallow graves await. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 There comes a time when law an' rules an' jails ain't enough ta fix things the same as a bullet can. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I don't insinuate. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 It ain't the speed of a man's hand what kills ya... It's tha bullets. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Muh problem ain't the bank's. Ya got till sundown ta settle up your debt ta me. Ah'll be getting drunk at the hotel when yore ready to pay. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I shudder to think of the unholy offspring the pair of you would bring into this world. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I ain't gonna barter or negotiate. All conversation is gonna be handled with bullets. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Th' only reason yore alive an' they're dead is that those men had bounties on 'em. You don't. Not yet. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Cast judgement if'n ya like, Maisy. Don't bother me none. Ah am who ah am. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 That wet feelin' in yer drawers is fear. But don't worry... It will pass. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Tell your men to lower their weapons or I'll drop the lot of ya here and now... Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 A thousand dollars? That's enough for three killings. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah dare ya ta shoot. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Tryin’ ta kill me once is more than enough ta warrant a grave. Tryin’ it twice earns a more creative solution. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I can get ya help, honey. -- yer still beautiful... Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Don’t worry. Me an trouble… We go way back. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 'Cause it just ain't civilized. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Problem is, every town's got a tough guy with aspirations a' bein' a gunfighter. An' in every town I meet one of them fellas, there's a fresh grave and a sad momma cryin' nights 'bout her poor dead son. You boys wouldn't wanna make yer mommas cry now, would ya? Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 These men are killers, same as wolves, and they're heading this way. Stay here and make tea for them if that's what ya feel is gonna work for ya. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 There's always a choice. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah heard Crested Ridge wuz a friendly town, so ah suppose you boys are here ta escort me ta the saloon? Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I pissed in yer. whiskey more times than ah can remember. That wuz one of them nights. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 I don't know yer business here, but you just shot my horse for no good reason. I had no quarrel with you boys, but that's all over now. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 That war's over. I'm takin' the only side that makes sense... mine. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 You got yer money, so unless you want ta witness the Lord in person, ride on the Hell away from me. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 You'd have a hard time keepin' down the soup I made with your insides all shot fulla holes. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Aw, shet yore miserable mouth, ya danged female buzzard! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah always treat muhself to a thick steak after killing a skunk thet shoots a marshal in the back. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 You could'a saved yourself a heap of jawin' by saying how much money you wuh willin' to pay for my services, girl! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 The more ah see of people, the more ah choose to be alone. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Blazes! Seems everytime ah come in this saloon somebody comes in after me with a gun! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Don't quote me whut the Bible says about forgiving... 'cause it also says "an eye fer an eye!" Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Pretty girls from Boston schools shouldn't aim guns at ugly men from half-way t'hell. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah'm beginning to think ah done thet boyfriend of yours a favor! Ah killed him real quick-like! If ah had left him with you, he'd probably have been slowly talked to death! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Someday ah aim tuh shove a tamale down yore throat, Sanchez. Ah jus' hope yuh ain't too greasy tuh feel it. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Durin' th' war 'twixt the states, ah had ju' 'bout as much'a muh country's gratitude as ah could stand! Damn near killed me, all thet gratitude! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ain't yuh never been tuh th' theater before? Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Once had a girl back in Abilene... tell me ah wuz at muh meanest when muh nap was interrupted. But ah don't believe a word of it. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 In muh whole life ah've only switched sides once in th' middle of a fight... an' after thet once, ah swore ah'd never do it again, no matter whut. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 It's a lucky thing they caught me 'tween jobs. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah cain't do it anymore, Jeb. Ah cain't go on killin' Yankees when they's fightin' tuh give th' black folks their freedom, an' we's fightin' tuh preserve a world whut's prob'ly better off dead an' done with! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 If'n yo're lookin' tuh have a shootout, yuh'll have tuh find a way tuh have it all by yoreself! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Wal, Jonah Boy, looks lahk yore still alive an' breathin'. Not thet yuh deserve tuh be. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Careful now, girls an' boys! One strange move an' you'n yore eyeballs gonna be partin' company! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah swear, some days it just don't hardly seem tuh pay tuh get outa bed. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Ah'm surprised you all ain't got 'round tuh makin' breathin' a hangin' offense! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Don't go doin' nuthin' yuh'll be sorry fer. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Actually, ah'm a travelin' bible salesman. Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

Quote1 Looks like the trail ends here, Jonah Boy! All muh life ah've rode with death... now he's starin' me straight in the eyeballs! Quote2

--Jonah Hex (New Earth)

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