"Catch as Catscan": A group of Catwoman's ex-henchmen dressed as "cat burglars" attempt to steal a prototype catscan machine from a warehouse. [[Bruce Wayne (N
- I'm only doing this for your own good! We thieves have to stick together, my dear... even if I have to tear your mind to pieces to do it!
- -- Joker
Appearing in "Catch as Catscan"
- Barry Dark (radio DJ)
- Cat Burglars (gang)
- Crandall (Single appearance)
- Straight Line (Joker henchman)
- Gotham City
Synopsis for "Catch as Catscan"A group of Catwoman's ex-henchmen dressed as "cat burglars" attempt to steal a prototype catscan machine from a warehouse. Batman and Robin show up to beat the crap out of them. Their leader Crandall takes a hostage, but Catwoman arrives and takes him down with her whip. Catwoman expresses disappointment in Crandall, having given him enough to "start over" when she went straight and broke up the gang. Later on the roof, Catwoman asks Batman if this was enough to make him believe that she's good now. Batman explains it's not that he doesn't believe her, he's just not sure if a romantic relationship would be possible in their line of work. Catwoman invites Batman back to her apartment, but he declines. She reminds him that she cannot wait forever, and leaves. Batman explains to Robin the reason he's hesitant to date Catwoman is that all of his relationships seem to end in ruin.
The Joker sits in his hideout trying to plan a new crime, feeling like he's hit a creative slump. His henchmen suggest a bank robbery, and he dismisses it as "a common pedestrian crime." Straight Line shows him a newspaper with Batman and Catwoman on the front page, and Joker is finally inspired.
Back in the Batcave, Batman teaches Robin how to fight a knife-wielding attacker. Alfred serves them Jason's favorite dish (pot roast), but the Bat-Signal appears and they have to leave before they can eat. Batman and Robin meet up with Catwoman at GCPD Headquarters. Commissioner Gordon tells them the Joker is back, and they've received a card with a clue on the back. Batman and Robin deduce that Joker is planning to steal a rare first edition copy of "Joe Miller's Joke Book" from the Gotham Public Library. Robin excitedly says "Holy Gutenberg! Let's go!" and Batman tells him to never use this catchphrase again.
Batman, Catwoman, and Robin find the Joker and his gang in the library. Batman and Robin deal with the thugs while Catwoman runs after the Joker. The Joker chastises her for switching teams, and knocks her out with an electro-shock. Straight Line shoots Batman and Robin with a gun that traps them in constricting goo. Batman eventually slips out of his bonds and rescues Robin, but the Joker has already left with Catwoman.
The Joker holds Catwoman prisoner, and reveals that he's hired evil scientist Doctor Moon. Moon intends to use Catwoman in one of his immoral experiments, proving that free will is an illusion and the mind can be molded like clay. They wake her up because Moon wants her conscious so he can measure her pain levels correctly. Catwoman is hooked up to the catscan prototype that Joker had stolen earlier. They flip the machine on to painfully destroy her mind and make her evil again.
- This issue is the first part of a two-part story that concludes next issue.
- The first six issues of Mike W. Barr's run on Detective Comics (#569-574) have a strange position in continuity. It's clear that they take place in Post-Crisis continuity (following the Crisis on Infinite Earths), because the book switches over at the Legends crossover in #568. However, they were written prior to Frank Miller's reboot of Batman's origins in Year One and Max Allan Collins' reboot of Robin's origins in Batman #408. These stories are technically no longer part of Pre-Crisis continuity, but they're also missing some elements of the Post-Crisis reboots.
- Robin exclaims "Holy Gutenberg!" when they learn the crime is taking place at a library, and Batman tells him to "never do that again." This is a joking reference to the 60's Batman TV series where "Holy _____!" was Robin's catchphrase.
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