"Many Happy Returns": In freezing Berchtesgaden, Jenny Sparks is spending her 43rd birthday running away from Nazis on horseback. Her horse is shot and her pursuers demand she hand over the Tibetan Egg.
- Just once I'd like to read about a megalomaniac or a serial killer I wasn't linked with at some point in the past.
- -- Jenny Sparks
Appearing in "Many Happy Returns"
- Albert Speer
- Mr. Rumpole
Synopsis for "Many Happy Returns"
In freezing Berchtesgaden, Jenny Sparks is spending her 43rd birthday running away from Nazis on horseback. Her horse is shot and her pursuers demand she hand over the Tibetan Egg.
The story flashes back to her thirteenth birthday, where, as a student at a Vienna girls' school, she is informed that she has become orphaned and destitute due to the death of her parents in the Titanic disaster. Her godfather, Prof. Albert Einstein, has agreed to complete her education in Zurich. This is perfectly fine for Jenny, who's been miserable in Vienna, where her only friend is a badly struggling artist named Adolf...
Back in 1943, Sparks manages to toast the first wave of soldiers, but is incapacitated by a dart filled with Largactil and taken back to the Eagle's Nest for questioning.
Another flashback to 1913. Just before leaving for Zurich, Jenny says goodbye to Adolf and suggests that his inability to sell his paintings is due to a lack of artistic talent. She suggests he try his hand at local politics.
In Berchtesgaden, Sparks is introduced to Dr. Speers, who informs her that the egg that she stole contained a tiny woman of immense power who would hatch in the later part of the 20th century. He gloats that she will be sent away to be dissected by Dr. Goebbels, and once they figure out the source of her powers, they will use it to destroy the Allied forces.
In 1913, Adolf burns all of his old paintings to make way for the future.
In Berchtesgaden, Sparks is about to be dragged off to Dachau when an old friend appears - Adolf Hitler. Upon recognizing the one person who helped him in his worst times, he orders that she be returned safely to England with the egg, claiming that this will confuse the Allies and make them think the Nazis have something more powerful up their sleeve. As Sparks is sent home, Hitler muses to himself that this is his birthday gift to her.
Skipping forward to 1998 at the Skywatch base, Jenny is depressed because President Bill Clinton - whose life she saved back in the distant past - has just ordered a missle strike on a factory in Sudan after being forced to give testimony that he received oral sex in the Oval Office, This has reminded her of all the other bad things that she has indirectly caused over the years - World War II, the Holocaust, Iran-Contra, etc. Her girlfriend Shen comes round to comfort her, telling her that as the Spirit of the 20th Century, it is inevitable that she will be connected to both the good things and the bad things that occur. Shen tells Jenny that everything happens for a reason. Shen speaks from experience - had Jenny not encouraged Adolf all those years ago, the Fuhrer would not have insisted that the Nazis spare her life and give her the egg, and thus Shen herself would never have been born.
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