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"The Stargaze Rally!, Part One: Of Bikes and Booze": At the State line of Dakoty, hundreds of helmets are tossed aside as their rugged owners enter "Biker Heaven," revving up for a week of drunken debauchery and reckless racing in Stargaze's annual Biker Rally 5000 event.


Quote1 I'm hungover -- th' Ghostboys cleaned me out at poker -- an' it feels like Jimby's babe's left me some kinda crustacean memento! Quote2
-- Lobo



Appearing in "The Stargaze Rally!, Part One: Of Bikes and Booze"

Featured Characters:

Supporting Characters:

  • Rufus McDoofus (First appearance)
  • Jimby (Single appearance; dies; and as a skeleton)
  • Jimby's Girl (Single appearance; unnamed)
  • Machineman Kelly (First appearance)

Villains

  • Herbert the Pervert (Single appearance)

Other Characters:

  • The Ghostboys (Single appearance)
  • The Tuff Girls (First appearance)
  • The Tattooed Samoans (First appearance)
  • Bloody Mary (Single appearance)
  • The PsychoBillyBoys (Single appearance)
  • The Pacemakers (Only appearance; dies)
  • The Rolex Raiders (First appearance; either die or arrested)
  • Judge X (First appearance; unnamed) (Cameo)
  • Buella Blatt (Mentioned only)
  • Gertie Haunch (Mentioned only)
  • The Schene Brothers (Mentioned only)
  • Charlie Schene (Mentioned only)
  • Marty Schene (Mentioned only)
  • No Mouth Ron (Mentioned only)

Locations:

  • Dakoty
  • Stargaze
  • The Lux Hotel
  • Room 666
  • Poolside
  • Game Room
  • Stargaze Zoo
  • Zoo Bar
  • Fabuloso Cave
  • Mount Tushmore (Destroyed)
  • Demonstration Arena
  • The Rusty Pig
  • Sheriff's Office
  • Wet Willies Bar

Items:

  • Bug Icy Beer
  • Guz Beer
  • Blue Dawg Beer
  • Hyborean Ale (Mentioned only)

Vehicles:

Synopsis for "The Stargaze Rally!, Part One: Of Bikes and Booze"

At the State line of Dakoty, hundreds of helmets are tossed aside as their rugged owners enter "Biker Heaven," revving up for a week of drunken debauchery and reckless racing in Stargaze's annual Biker Rally 5000 event.

Lobo checks into The Lux Hotel incognito. The receptionist hands him the key to room 666 while mentioning he looks familiar. Lobo slams his head onto the front desk before he can recall any more. Upstairs 'Bo finds out they've double-booked the room and the slob already occupying it claims first rights. Lobo forcefully ejects him out of the window.

Lobo spends the first day in the games room, hoping to settle some business with one of the pro-racers, but he's in a V.I.P. area and the bouncers won't let him pass. He shows restraint and leaves the bouncers - for now - and instead instigates a fight with Herbert the Pervert to release his built up tension.

On the second day he catches up with an acquaintance from the previous year, Jimby, who is with his girl. They head to the Stargaze Zoo together where Jimby agitates the black holes of Dakoty. Jimby's fun backfires when one of the creatures grabs hold of his arm and sucks him up, spitting out his skeletal remains. His girl is in tears so 'Bo escorts her to the Zoo Bar to drown her sorrows. He spends the rest of the day taking in the geological sights like the Fabuloso Cave and Mount Tushmore. As he witnesses the monthly cleaning of the posterior carvings by fire, Lobo asks the ranger what would happen if someone added liquid fraggamite to the mix, just as the monument is coincidentally destroyed in a humongous explosion.

The third day is the traditional biker parade. Lobo goads Bloody Mary into into tucking a grenade into one of the geriatric bikers' panniers. The next unwanted bikers he spots are the Rolex Raiders, a group of snooty lawyers that Lobo starts an unprovoked brawl with. The police come to break up the disturbance and Lobo sneaks out of the dust cloud and they haul off his victims instead.

The pros perform a demonstration show on day four. Lobo heckles Machineman Kelly while still trying to access the pros' private area without making a scene, as he has 147 outstanding warrants on himself from last year. Hungover, broke, and itching from something Jimby's girl passed on, Lobo spots Rufus McDoofus wearing a T-shirt that boldly claims he's wanted on five worlds. Lobo confronts him, asking if the boast is accurate, and when Rufus confirms he's worth ten thousand credits, 'Bo knocks him out and drags him to the Sheriff's office. Collecting his reward, while evading the fact that his wanted poster is pinned to the wall, Lobo confuses the Sheriff by asking how much the bail is for Rufus. He posts the five grand bail and drags Rufus to the nearest bar where they blow the remainder of the money on an all night bender.

Loosing track of time, the two drunkards head off to the first qualifying race, unaware that it has started without them. They turn the corner leading to the starting line only to face an oncoming wave of speeding bikers, causing a massive pile up. Lobo grins from beneath the mound of wreckage, loving every moment.



Notes

Trivia

  • Somehow there is a renegade Judge from the future dystopia, Mega-City One competing named, "Judge X" in the the following issue.
  • Mount Tushmore is a parody of Mount Rushmore.
  • There is a gag about a Samoan having a great time with a lawyer, a reference to Dr. Gonzo from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, where Hunter S. Thompson described him as being Samoan.
  • The Schene Brothers are a gag referring to Martin and Charlie Sheen who are father and son.
  • The Rusty Pig has a sign advertising "Hyborean Ale," a potential reference to Conan.
  • The Sheriff of Stargaze wears a monocle.
  • Jimby's skeletal remains can be seen participating in the qualifying race.



See Also


Recommended Reading

  • None.


Links and References

  • No external links.