"Zero Girl: Part 2": Amy Smootster wakes up in the office of her guidance counsellor Tim Foster, who has allowed her to stay there despite his professional position. Tim arrives soon after with groceries, and is surprised to find Amy w

Quote1 What? Like you've never had one of your students crash in your office and wake up in your T-shirt before? Quote2
-- Amy Smootster

Appearing in "Zero Girl: Part 2"

Featured Characters:

Supporting Characters:


  • Bullies
  • Michelle
  • Carrie

Other Characters:

  • Uncle Carl


  • Brownsville High School



Synopsis for "Zero Girl: Part 2"

Amy Smootster wakes up in the office of her guidance counsellor Tim Foster, who has allowed her to stay there despite his professional position. Tim arrives soon after with groceries, and is surprised to find Amy wearing nothing but one of his shirts. He attempts to retain his composure while she changes into yesterday's clothes (after passing on an outfit that he claims to have found in his office).
Mr. Foster tries to talk about the weird situation with Amy and her relationship with shapes, her running away from home, and her staying in his office. He tries with difficulty to shrug off her romantic advances, and she doesn't appreciate it. He suggests that perhaps Amy's relationship with shapes is a way for her to escape from reality. Amy becomes angry with him for doubting her and for brushing off her advances, and storms out of the office. However, as soon as she is outside, something is pulled over his head, so she can't see, and she is knocked unconscious.
She wakes in the park across the street from the school, being held down by the girls who have been bullying her. One holds her head down while the other two grip her feet, hoping to humiliate her enough to make her feet produce their strange excretion, so they can collect it in a bowl. The leader of the bullies believes that the excretion has some kind of power in it, which she hopes to use.
Remembering that Amy has a problem with squares, the bullies drag her to a locker room, and lock her inside one. Inside, Amy desperately tries not to feel humiliated, not wanting to give them what they want from her. She pounds on the door as they walk away laughing. Instinctively, she reaches back in her mind for another embarrassing moment, and focuses on it.
Twenty minutes later, Amy is naked except for a blanket, visiting with a sow beetle that she calls Uncle Carl. Somehow, the process of focusing on a past moment of shame resulted in her escape from the locker, and the destruction of her clothes. Uncle Carl conveys that the future is an even stronger place to draw humiliating moments from.
The bullies return to the locker room and discover a gaping hole in the locker where they had stuffed Amy. On the floor nearby is a puddle of her foot-fluid, along with a pile of bricks. The leader realizes that Amy is more powerful when deeply shamed, and orders her friends to get a sponge to soak up Amy's excretions.
Reluctantly, Amy puts on the 'cute' outfit that was in Mr. Foster's closet, since she has no clothes. Outside, the bullies see her in Mr. Foster's office and are both disgusted and jealous of her connection with the counsellor. The leader reveals that she got a contact high from the excretion they collected, which made her see everything as squares. She felt an amazing rush of power from it.
Mr. Foster tries to have Amy look at some targeted Rorschach tests, but Amy is more interested in trying to convince him that she will be okay if he gives in to his feelings and has a romantic relationship with him. Frustrated with her relentlessness, Mr. Foster suggests they take a break and go to the park. As they get into his car, the bullies notify Vice Principal Hooley of Mr. Foster's behaviour, heavily suggesting that he and Amy have a sexual relationship. The vice principal promises to speak with him when he returns.
In the park, Amy and Mr. Foster are attacked by a thug with a knife, who tries to mug them. Instinctively, Amy turns her umbrella inside out, and the circular shape turns into a monster that scares the would-be mugger away. realizing that she's wet her shoes again, she and Mr. Foster sit down on a nearby bench. Over the course of their conversation, Amy begins to break down Mr. Foster's defences, and the two of them nearly kiss.
Suddenly, they are interrupted by the appearance of an angular lawn mower driving around by itself. To Amy, the lawnmower appears as a toothy monster, and it digs one of its teeth into her shoes. The mower drags Amy away as Mr. Foster ineffectually tries to reason out how the mower got loose. Fortunately, the mower loses its grip on her, and crashes into a nearby tree. In anger, Amy grabs a baseball bat from the ground and smashes the mower violently before suddenly passing out.
Amy wakes in Nurse Wilson's office, who suggests that the collapse was related to low blood sugar. Outside, Mr. Foster desperately tries to force his way into the office, while he is detained by the vice principal and the bullies. He manages to get inside, finally, as they pound on the door outside.
Mr. Foster warns Amy against making advances on him, trying to convey how much trouble he is in, since the vice principal thinks he's taking advantage of his position of authority - with a minor, no less. He realizes that something is caught in Amy's skirt, digging into her. He assures himself that it is simply part of the mower, and not a tooth like Amy claims it is. The nurse returns, and nearly opens the door for the vice principal, but Mr. Foster convinces her that he is not having an inappropriate relationship with Amy. As he steels himself for the inevitable, he asks the nurse what the piece he pulled from Amy's skirt looks like. She answers that it's simply a piece of metal. Mr. Foster throws it in the garbage with discomfort. It looks like a tooth to him.


  • This issue is reprinted in the Zero Girl trade paperback.


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